They'd never say that!
by xxMitsuko6xx
Summary: Still not mine....Things that Naruto charcters would NEVER say, from Naruto central.


A list of things Naruto Characters would never say

Asuma

- "I love you Kurenai! Will you marry me"  
- "I quit smoking a month ago."

Choji

- "No thanks Shino. I'm not hungry"  
- "I lost 300 pounds on the subway diet"  
- "Oooooh no! Not another bite"  
- "I only lost 100 pounds on the Atkins diet"  
- "Does this outfit make me look fat?"

Gai

- "That's it! I'm shaving these ugly eyebrows."

Gaara

- "I hate sand! I think I'm allergic to it"  
- "Temari and Kankuro, why don't we get along"  
- "Hold on! There is sand in my eye"  
- "Who needs a hug?"

Haku

- "I hate you Zabuza... shove it"  
- "Wow! I make a pretty good looking girl... pass the lip stick please."

Hidan

- "Ahhh! I think I broke a nail"  
- "I don't feel like praying today."

Hinata

- "I love you Neji"  
- "Naruto! I hate your way of the ninja! It doesn't work on me!"

Ino

- "Who cares about looks"  
- "Eww... I hate purple."

Itachi

- "I'm so weak. I wish I wasn't such a woman"  
- "Violence isn't necessary; can't we all just get along"  
- "I want my mommy"  
- "I did NOT have incest with Sasuke"  
- "I miss my family"  
- "Hey Kisame, do you think pink nails would match me better"  
- "Sasuke, no hug for a family member?"

Jiraiya

- "Oh man! Not another naked chick"  
- "Do you guys think of anything besides women"  
- "Ahh the fourth was not anything special"  
- "That's right. I'm a virgin and proud of it"  
- "I, Jiraiya, solemnly swear never to look at another boob"  
- "I love big butts and I can not lie"  
- "I've never looked at porn"  
- "The internet is not for porn. It's for educational purposes"  
- "You are young. You are free. Why don't you sleep with me?"

Kabuto

- "I never told Orochimaru that he kinda looks like a girl"

- "Oh why did I never finish the Ninja Academy"  
- "I think Shizune likes me"

Kakashi

- "I think I'm going to show up for training early today"  
- "Man, my partners died.. oh well better them than me"  
- "I'm too lazy to choose the color of my mask today"  
- "Naruto! You could read my Come Come Paradise"  
- "Do I save my comrades or finish the mission? Oh, screw this, I'll just kill my comrades and finish it myself."

Kankuro

- "Hey Gaara, can I build a sand castle with your sand"  
- "Puppets are kinda boring; I think I'm going to be a ventriloquist instead"  
- "To tell you the truth, puppets kind of freak me out"  
- "Oh my dollies look so pretty today."

Kiba

- "You're a bad dog, Akamaru"  
- "I think I'm allergic to dogs"  
- "I want a cat"  
- "AKAMARU! WHAT DID I TELL YOU WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF I FOUND OUT YOU PEED ON THE RUG? -Brings Akamaru outside with a shotgun-"

Kisame

- "Gaassp, I can't breath"  
- "Hey guys, let's go to a fish buffet for dinner!"

Konohamaru

- "Naruto! You're a bad leader! I'm going to look for Sasuke!"

Kakuzu

- "You guys are so obsessed with money! Don't you fight for anything else?"

Naruto

- "Shut up, Sakura I don't want to be Hokage today"  
- "I don't like ramen! Let's eat tofu"  
- "I hate the color orange"  
- "I love you Neji."

Neji

- "I love you more Hinata."

Orochimaru

- "Ok, lets pretend I'm straight for one minute"  
- "I have one more snake that you haven't seen, Sasuke"  
- "I'm the guy who did Michael Jackson's plastic surgery."

Rock Lee

- "Hey Gai-Sensei! Can I enter a ninjutsu contest"  
- "Gai, stop hugging little boys and get a girlfriend"  
- "Sakura, does nothing appease you"  
- "Sakura, you are so ugly. I hate girls with pink hair"  
- "Sorry Gaara, I stole your eyebrows"  
- "Gai, I'm done with these spandex; it's really causing me to itch now."

Sakura

- "Screw this, this ninja thing ain't for me. I just wanted to be near Naruto"  
- "Damn Sasuke, you're even uglier than I am"  
- "Damn Sasuke get a hair cut."

Sasuke

- "I'm sorry Itachi. I don't feel like fighting today"  
- "You know, I'll stop hunting Itachi. I think I'll just enjoy life and marry Sakura"  
- "Naruto, I love you. You are much more than a brother to me"  
- I'm not emo. Breaks into song I walk a lonely road, the only road that I have ever known. Cuts wrists Don't know where it go... passes out

Shikamaru

- "I'm sooo hyper. Lets run laps around Kohana for a hour"  
- "Ino I hate you; you're such a bitch. Yet you're so hot marry me"  
- "Whats 1 1?"

Shizune

- "Tsunade-sama, I don't wanna work for you anymore!"

Shino

- "Oh my god, did you see the size of that bug"  
- "Eww... get that thing out of your mouth you don't know were it has been"  
- A bug! A bug! Get it off me! Get it off me!  
- HAHAHAHAHA!

Temari

- "This damn fan is really starting to get heavy."

The Third Hokage

- "This village sucks. I'm moving to Hawaii."

Tsunade

- "I hate being young. I wish I didn't have this jutsu going" - "Mmmmm grubs slimy yet satisfying"  
- "Gambling is horrible. I'll pick up a better hobby like collecting shells"  
- "I am NOT a total whore"  
- "God I'm glad that Dan creep died. I swear he was stalking me"  
- "Shizune, do you think I am flat-chested"  
- "They call it HO-kage for a reason!"


End file.
